Sometimes making the decision to homeschool is more draining than homeschooling itself. Even though their children are
doing very well at home, many mothers agonize annually over whether to continue homeschooling. Here are some suggestions that
I hope will help you discern God’s will for the coming school year.
1. We need to put our agonizing in perspective by accepting the fact that “agonizing” is part
of the homeschooling mother’s job description—and move on. When we realize that constant agonizing and
re-evaluation are just part of the process, we don’t have to consider putting our kids in school every time we find
a new situation over which to agonize!
2. Take a day off to spend in prayer, meditation, and seeking the Lord.
If you can’t afford a baby-sitter, switch days with a friend. While things are quiet and you are alone, take the time
to review your reasons for homeschooling in the first place. If you have never written a philosophy of education, now is a
good time to do it. In my early years of homeschooling, I used to get out my written version of “Why I Homeschool”
to remind myself of those reasons on difficult days. Sometimes a few hours of quiet and “alone” time will help
you put things in perspective and will give you the time you need to order your thoughts and prayers as you seek God’s
3. Don’t be afraid to admit where you think you have failed. There is not a homeschooling
parent or a classroom teacher in this country who is perfect. We all have shortcomings and areas in which we need to improve.
Write down the areas that you perceive to be problematic for you and/or your children and begin seeking solutions. Oftentimes
problems seem bigger than they are if we allow them to float nebulously around in our heads. By giving voice to them, by writing
them down, we can often put them in a clearer perspective.
Are you disappointed in your child’s math scores?
Hire a tutor, change curriculum, or be more consistent in daily work. Has your child’s behavior been a problem? Write
out the specific behavior that is bothering you, and look for positive solutions. Sometimes your husband, mother, or friend
can help you to be more objective about behaviors that need to be changed, as well as helping you find positive ways to deal
with those changes. Don’t be afraid to ask for help—it takes a strong person to go to another for advice.
point is to identify the problem areas that are nagging at you. Commit them to the Lord, and trust Him to help you deal with
them. You do not have to put your children into a “real” school because your homeschool is not perfect. There
is no perfect homeschool, nor is there a perfect institutional school.
4. Write down and reflect upon the progress
you and your children have made, as well as the things that have been successful. Remember to thank the Lord for
His faithfulness. We tend to overlook the fifty good things about the year while we focus on three negative aspects. Be optimistic.
Everyone will be happier.
5. Remember that if your children were “in school,” neither your life
nor theirs would be problem-free. Do not fall prey to “the grass is always greener” mentality. Ask your
friends whose children are in school what problems they are struggling with. You’ll be surprised.
this has been your first year to homeschool, take heart. The second year is almost always better and more manageable.
It’s like the difference in your freshman and sophomore years of high school or college—once you know the ropes,
things get easier.
7. Call a friend who has been homeschooling longer than you have and ask her how she has
decided to continue homeschooling year-after-year.
8. Consider going to the “block” decision-making
process. Divide your children’s education into four segments: K5-second grade; third grade-fifth grade; sixth
grade-eighth grade; and high school. Commit to homeschooling one block at a time. That gives you the freedom to plan overall
goals for three-to-four-years at a time, without feeling like you’ve committed to a thirteen-year process. This allows
you to channel your energies into planning for the next year, rather than committing all of your energy into trying to decide
whether or not to homeschool again.
I can still remember the freedom I experienced in 1990 when I decided to homeschool
my fifth grader through the eighth grade. I quit worrying about how long I was going to homeschool and began focusing my energies
toward the education process itself. Remember, your decision is not irreversible.
9. Don’t allow yourself
to fall prey to peer pressure. Don’t homeschool because you feel pressure from others to continue. By the same
token, don’t decide to put your children into an institutional school because of the pressure of others.
the words of the Lord recorded in Joshua, “Have I not commanded you, be strong and courageous? Do not tremble or be
dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
10. Above all, remember that this is a
short season in your child’s life. Now that I have two children who have graduated from college and my youngest
will be a senior in high school next year, I can tell you how quickly the years pass. Don’t let your fears rob you of
these precious, irretrievable years with your children.
If I had only one thing I could change about our homeschooling
experience, I would worry less and enjoy my family more. But, as a veteran homeschooling mom who has agonized a lot and made
many mistakes during my twenty-year tenure, I can honestly say it has all been worth it. I would not trade the priceless gems
that we as a family have mined together during the years for anything this world has to offer.
My advice to
you is simply this: Go for it! May God be with you and your family as you seek to raise your children in a manner
that is pleasing to Him. And, remember, we at Broadman and Holman and LifeWay.com are here to help you and encourage you along
Zan Tyler is the Homeschool Resource and Media Consultant for Broadman and Holman
Publishers and Homeschool Editor for LifeWay Christian Resources, on the Web at www.lifeway.com/homeschool. She and her husband
Joe have three children and have been homeschooling since 1984.